ā€œAquarium Psychoā€

 

Well Hello.

Are you one of the millions muttering ā€œI work because I have to, not because I want toā€ while feeling powerless to change this?

I help amateur investors & wannabe retirees make more by stock picking as a hobby than they earn in their jobs (this is at times an understatement), so they can retire on their terms and conquer the terror of outliving their money.

Do you have urgency, solvency, and gender-ambiguous balls? Watch this presentation. Launch your lifetime of investing. Earn your Findependence.

TEACH YOURSELF TO FISH
 

This is reel if you’re for real. Here’s what some Finatics say…

 
 
 
 
 

(I’m aware it sounds ridiculous. But in the hands of offishially serious clients, ā€œFind Fat Fish helps amateur investors make more by stock picking as a hobby than they earn in their jobsā€ plays out, long-term, as a probability & understatement. Because the math of compound interest dictates that investing is far more powerful than income.)

 
 
FUCK YES, I'M IN, LET'S FISH
heck no, i'm scared, let's "research"
 
"Fat Fish on Bed of Greens"

"Fat Fish on Bed of Greens"

About The Mascot

Fat Fish Are Opportunities To Turn 1 Month Of Expenses Into 1 Year Of Freedom. Find Fat FishĀ® is personal training for personal finance.

I will help you catch Your First StockĀ®, then build your own portfolio, replacing needless fear with fact-based faith, going on offense without sacrificing your defense, until you've learned to fish forever and don't need me or anyone. (If, and only if, you’re ready.)

LEARN HOW TO FISH
 
 
ā€œTwenty years in this business convinces me that any normal person using the customary three percent of the brain can pick stocks just as well, if not better, than the average Wall Street expert.ā€
— Peter Lynch (the Michael Jordan of institutional investing), in One Up On Wall Street
 
 

About The Mission

ā€œGive a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.ā€

Almost no one is prepared, psychologically or financially, for the post-revenue environment of retirement. So the two problems I’m most devoted to helping determined people solve are ā€œI work because I have to, not because I want to… and after all this school and work and sacrifice, I am faced with a codnundrum: never retire, or outlive my money.ā€

ā€œRich Dad, Pole Dadā€

 
"Trust Me, I’m A Sturgeon"

"Trust Me, I’m A Sturgeon"

About The Flounder

I am Cole Hauptfuhrer šŸ‘‹

Flounder & Chief Executive Offisher of Find Fat Fish, author of 12 Steps To Your First Stock, vagabonding speaker (NZ, Bali, Find Fat Fish’s Codcast), and Supreme Grill Sergeant of Find Fat Fish’s Swim School.

One of the few ā€œfinfluencersā€ who can powerfully answer ā€œWhat is your best case study?ā€ (I’ve helped people retire years or decades faster based on 8 weeks of training & 2 years of followthrough), I am a specialist in part-time focus investing.

Disturbed to learn I was an English Major training to become a verbal acrobat, my dad yanked me out of college and taught me investing in one week on a cruise ship. I went from knowing nothing about stock-picking to quadrupling my first investment—then rolling those proceeds into even-fatter winners that are sitting in your kitchen—using simple principles I teach people in my Your First StockĀ® workshop.

After 19 years of investing as a hobby to fund the life I want to live, this continues to amaze me: investing is the most lucrative & lazy-intelligent skillset on the planet but it’s taught well damn near nowhere. So I’ve built Find Fat Fish to do for you what my dad did for me. (If, and only if, you’re ready.)

 
 
ā€œIf you invest $1,000 in a stock, all you can lose is $1,000, but you stand to gain $10,000 or even $50,000 over time if you’re patient. The average person can concentrate on a few good companies, while the fund manager is forced to diversify. By owning too many stocks, you lose this advantage of concentration. It only takes a handful of big winners to make a lifetime of investing worthwhile.ā€
— Peter Lynch (please reflect on what this means)
 
FUCK YES, I'M IN, LET'S FISH
HECK NO, I'M SCARED, LET'S "RESEARCH"
 
ā€œThe highest rates of return I’ve ever achieved were in the 1950s. I killed the Dow. You ought to see the numbers. But I was investing peanuts then. It’s a huge structural advantage not to have a lot of money. I think I could make you 50% a year on $1 million. No, I know I could. I guarantee that.ā€
— Warren Buffett (PLEASE REFLECT ON WHAT THIS MEANS)
 

Hmm. Still ā€œresearchingā€, eh? Here’s what more Finatics say…

 
 
 

ā¬†ļø They’ve all won here šŸŽ£. Why can’t you?

FUCK YES, I'M IN, LET'S FISH
Heck No, I'm Scared, Let's "Research"